


Empress for a Day

by SagiDraconis



Series: One Piece, One Shot [1]
Category: One Piece
Genre: Comedy, Friendship, Funny, Humor, Humour, Oneshot, Random - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-23
Updated: 2020-05-23
Packaged: 2021-03-03 00:21:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,497
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24335788
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SagiDraconis/pseuds/SagiDraconis
Summary: After Koala saves Boa Hancock from an encounter with a World Noble, Hancock decides to take her back to Amazon Lily to repay her. However, Hancock's idea of repayment isn't quite what Koala has in mind. [ONESHOT]
Series: One Piece, One Shot [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1756921
Comments: 5
Kudos: 14





	Empress for a Day

"Ah!" Boa Hancock draped dramatically backwards over Salome, "I miss Luffy."

"We know." Marigold and Sandersonia droned.

"He's been gone for over 2 months 12 days 3 hours and 46 minutes!"

"We know."

"I just don't know how I can bear not seeing him! "

"We know."

She'd been like this for days. Days which, if the two younger Gorgon Sisters were being honest with themselves, felt like years. The Love Sickness was getting so bad, that Elder Nyon insisted that the Snake Princess should leave the island and go and find him.

Even though...they had no idea where he was.

Marigold and Sandersonia sighed. They loved their sister, they really did, but sometimes she could really be a bit...much.

They only had two leads; a report that the Straw Hat pirates were seen on Fishman Island, and a newspaper article saying that the Straw Hats and the Heart Pirates had made an alliance.

A newspaper article that neither of them had actually managed to  _ read _ . Hancock, after seeing Luffy' picture in the paper, had pounced upon the article and never let it leave her grasp. Marigold had peered into her sister's room the same day, only to see the paper with hearts and kisses drawn around Luffy's face and a furious scribble blotting out Trafalgar Law's.

The two looked at each other. They just wanted to find Luffy as soon as possible so they could return to Amazon Lily. The marines had taken note of Boa Hancock's obvious infatuation with Luffy during The War of the Best. They couldn't harm her because of her Warlord status, but what about the rest of the Kuja. It didn't sit right with them.

Best to return home as fast as they could.

"Snake Princess." Ran, one of the more experienced Kuja Pirates, knocked on the door.

"What?" Hancock jolted upright, "Have you found him? My Luffy?"

"N...no." She bit her lip, "There's a ship heading this way. It's a world noble's."

Their blood froze. A world noble…

Boa Hancock was the first to react. "Ignore them," she declared, "No, steer away from them. Avoid them at all costs."

"Don't let them near us!" Sandersonia hissed.

"But they already adjusted course towards us."

Silence.

Hancock waved a hand, "Ran, leave us."

"Sister," Marigold blurted out as soon as she'd left, "what should we do?"

None of them wanted to see a Noble. For while rage burned in their veins, coarse and furious, they couldn't deny that the mere thought of seeing one made them want to curl into a dark corner.

Sandersonia grimaced, "There's nothing we  _ can _ do. If we don't meet them, they can remove the Snake Princess' Warlord status. Our hands are tied."

Hancock sucked in a deep, long breath. Nerves somewhat recollected, she stood, "Right. Let's go."

They opened the door.

Cr-ack!

Only to see the World Noble's ship get smashed in half.

Their jaws dropped. They were relieved, but who would do something so foolish as attack a Celestial Dragon?!

Floooooooooom!

The ship went up in flames.

No one knew quite what to say. So they said nothing, and just watched the object of their detestation slowly sink into the ocean.

"Well…" Sandersonia finally muttered, "That solves that problem."

Marigold raised an eyebrow at her. Sandersonia nodded back.

Get Hancock back to Amazon Lily as soon as possible.

"Heeeeeeey!"

They glanced over the railing. A tiny little figure waved enthusiastically from a wooden dinghy far, far below.

"Is Pirate Empress Boa Hancock up there?!"

A female. Was she the one who destroyed the Noble ship?

"What should we do, sister?"

"Let her come," Hancock settled back, Salome slithering round to make a chair for her, "She doesn't seem hostile to us at least."

The other two tensed, ready for anything. They could take anyone, hostile or not.

As the dinghy grew closer, the figure revealed to be a young, copper haired woman with a broad smile and innocent round eyes. Hancock was right. This was probably a stranger who just happened to be passing by. "I'd like to speak with the Pirate Empress. Can I come aboard?"

The ten Kuja pirates turned to their Captain.

"Let down the ladder."

"But Snake Princess-"

"I'm in a generous mood today."

Glancing between themselves, Marguerite and Sweet Pea ran to get the rope ladder.

"Who are you?" Hancock demanded before the stranger had even got to the deck. "And what do you want from me?"

The woman vaulted over the side, taking a moment to adjust her newsboy cap, "My name's Koala, it's a pleasure to meet you, Pirate Empress. I was finishing up some business, and recognised your Jolly Roger so-"

"What business?" Hancock raised an elegant finger towards the still smouldering wreck ahead of them, "Do you mean to say that you caused that?"

Koala's expression faltered, but she remained smiling, "Uh...yeah that was me. I've been tailing them for weeks, I had no idea though that you guys were going to meet. Sorry about that."

"We had no prior appointment." Her eyes narrowed. "Where are the rest of your accomplices?"

"Accomplices?" Koala blinked. "No, all of my comrades are back at base. I'm the only one out here."

"So you mean to say that you did...that… all by yourself?"

"Well, I think I might have overdone it a bit. I didn't mean for the boiler to explode… Uh, I'm not going to hear the end of this, especially when I keep grilling Sabo about going too far..."

Hancock's lips curled minutely upwards. So she was a warrior was she? If she was a Kuja, she would be one of the most respected fighters on the island. Perhaps even good enough to earn a place on the Kuja Pirates. Even so… She looked Koala up and down. Her attire didn't do her warrior nature justice.

"But anyways," Koala continued, "After I saw your ship, I wanted to come here to thank you on the behalf of one of my friends."

Now she was confused, "To thank me?"

"You protected his little brother during the War of the Best. Do you remember? Monkey D Luffy?"

She'd said the magic word. "LUFFY?!" Koala found herself pinned to the deck, "Have you seen him? Is he alright? Is he eating enough? I know how much he likes to eat, so he'd better be getting enough nutrients. Has he been remembering his vegetables? Too much meat can be bad for him, but he always looks so happy that I can't resist-"

"Uuuuuuuh…." Her eyes span.

"Sister," Marigold hissed in her ear, "She's not going to answer you like that."

"But I want to know about Luffy!"

Marigold and Sandersonia's eyes gleamed. The solution to all their problems might have just fallen into their laps.

"Well, sister," Sandersonia cajoled, "Our guest has just paid us a great debt in scaring away the Nobles. How about we invite her back to Amazon Lily-"

"But-!"

"Where you can ask her about Luffy all you want."

Hancock's back stiffened. It was impossible to tell what she was thinking, with a face so permanently twisted in disgust (with one noticeable exception) it could really be anything.

Sandersonia waited with baited breath.

"KUJA PIRATES!" The Pirate Empress barked, "Change our course for Amazon Lily! We need to properly thank our guest!"

"Oh you really shouldn't. The Revo...my  _ friends _ are probably expecting my report…"

"Nonsense!" She grinned, excitement somehow twisting into something...far more sinister, "You can't ignore the hospitality of a Warlord can you? You will be one of the few privileged outsiders who have set foot on our great country!"

Koala started crawling backwards, "I really need to be going…"

"Love Love Beam!"

Hancock flicked her hair over her shoulder as she turned from the petrified statue of Koala, "Kuja! Prepare a room for our guest."

"Sister...she's most likely to share more information if you are  _ nice _ to her…"

"Spare no expense." Her head raised, "When we get to Amazon Lily, you will treat her as you would treat me!" And with that, she strode back into her cabin to continue kissing Luffy's picture.

Koala would forgive her for this. Of course she would. Since she, Pirate Empress Boa Hancock, was beautiful.

* * *

"Chief of Staff, sir?"

"Mm?" Sabo blinked open a lazy eye, "What is it."

The revolutionary saluted, "It's Miss Koala, sir. Her report hasn't come in."

Sabo frowned. He still wasn't used to the saluting. "That's not like her. Is her transponder snail working?"

"We still have a connection, yes, but no one's picking up."

Very odd. Very, very odd. Sabo tapped the brim of his hat, "Thanks for letting me know. I'll give it one last try." He reached for the snail on his desk, dialing in Koala's number.

"Puru puru puru puru… Puru puru puru puru…"

Tense fingers drummed against his desk. Come on Koala...be safe.

"Ca-cha!"

He bolted upright, "Koala-!"

_ "Huh? The snail spoke!" _

That wasn't Koala's voice. He didn't recognise it at all. "Who...who's this?"

_ "Ooh! It did it again!" _

_ "Just what is this strange snail? It was part of the outsider's belongings wasn't it?" _

_ "We'd better tell the Snake Princess. She might kno-" _

Snake Princess? He'd heard enough. Slamming down the receiver, he abruptly got to his feet. The chair flew back, collapsing into a smoking pile against the wall.

"S...sir!" The revolutionary gaped as Sabo flung on his coat.

"Tell Dragon I'm going out for a few days. If he wants to find me-" He stormed out of his office- "I'll be heading to Amazon Lily!"

* * *

"Your hands are so...calloused!" Hancock exclaimed, raising the fingers in question right to her face.

"They're always like that." Koala replied hesitantly. There was no escape. Last thing she knew she was begging Boa Hancock to let her make her report, and then she was lying on silk sheets in the Empress' personal palace! "That's because I practice my Fish-man Karate every day."

"Fish-man Karate? But you are human?"

"That's right!" Koala puffed out her chest despite her better judgement, "I'm the first human who's mastered it!"

"A true warrior!" Hancock exclaimed proudly. She glanced back towards Marigold.

She nodded encouragingly, mouthing,  _ 'Get on her good side.' _

Hancock nodded back in determination. This was for Luffy. All for Luffy.

"I expect you don't get callouses…" Koala chuckled nervously. What was she doing? She should be trying to figure out a way to escape, not make conversation! But the Pirate Empress was so beautiful… Dammit! She wanted to bang her head against a wall.

"No, I do not get callouses since I am beautiful!"

Koala  _ really  _ wanted to bang her head against a wall.

"Snake Princess." A knock at the door, "The treatment is ready."

All the colour drained from Koala's face, "T...treatment?!"

"Why of course," Hancock drawled, "You are our esteemed guest after all. We need to give you the full extent of our hospitality!"

What hospitality? Amazon Lily had, to Koala's knowledge, never accepted any outsiders. So this was unheard of, "You seriously don't need to…"

Another snap of the fingers, and Koala found herself getting drenched with something cold...but not really wet. She dabbed her face, the substance producing an unpleasant squelch sound as she pulled her fingers away. Was this… sap?

"See? Now you are dirty and need a treatment," Hancock crowed triumphantly, her sisters groaning in the background. "Let's go let's go!" And in a whirlwind of insistent chatter, the Snake Princess all but pushed her out the room.

Why was she so insistent about her getting a treatment? Koala couldn't really figure out why. Although...she hadn't had a day off in ages. Sabo  _ had  _ been telling her to lighten up a little… But then again, that was Sabo.

"This-" Hancock flung open the doors with a flourish-"Is my private bath."

Perfumed steam flooded out of the room, the sheer heat making Koala stagger back. However, the room itself was not that impressive. The only light shone from windows of frosted glass, and that through the thick steam made the room look eerie rather than inviting. Koala wasn't even sure if she could see the far wall from where they stood, even though it couldn't be more than 20 meters away. Was this really a bath? It felt…

Lonely.

"You should feel fortunate. You are one of the few able to bathe with me."

She blinked, "And...?"

Hancock pursed her lips, "Other than my sisters and  _ LUFFY _ , I have not bathed with anyone." Her eyes flickered shut, "I bathed with Luffy…! Ah, Luffy!"

"Luffy!?" Koala whipped her head around so fast she was sure she felt a click, "As in...Sabo's little brother Luffy?!"

"Who is this 'Sabo'? Wait, never mind that," Hancock waved her hand, face flushed, "We can continue this in the bath."

Leaving their clothes outside, the two women slowly lowered themselves into the sweet smelling water. Which was...green?

"Herbs," Hancock said, noticing Koala's suspicion, "The water is infused with muscle relaxants, cleansers and moisturisers. A present from some of the Kuja."

"Ah."

They sat opposite each other. Not saying anything, just observing. It was intimidating really, to be in the same bath as the most beautiful woman in the world. Koala had never felt self conscious about her body, but even she felt a little embarrassed.

But at least the water felt good. She felt muscles relax that she didn't even know were tense. Sighing, Koala smiled. Perhaps she should take a break once in a while.

"So…" Hancock started, twiddling her fingers, "You said...you knew Luffy…"

Koala blinked, "Yeah. I work with his older brother, Sabo. Never hear the end of how cute or how awesome Luffy is..."

"He has another older brother?!" Hancock bolted upwards, "I thought he just had Ace."

"...It's complicated." Koala stared at the distorted reflection of her own face. Sabo wouldn't appreciate it if she spilled everything to a complete stranger. This information wasn't hers to tell.

She hummed pensively, sinking back into the steaming water, "I see. These things normally are. But anyway-" Leaning forwards, her eyes began to sparkle- "Tell me what you know about Luffy! How is he? Is he alright? Has he asked about me-"

"Woah woah woah-" Koala waved her hands frantically- "Give me a second here. Let me get my thoughts together."

Hancock deflated, "Okay…"

Koala raised an eyebrow, "You really like him don't you?"

"Like him?!" She shot to her feet, hand against her chest, "LIKE HIM?! I love him with every fiber of my being! He is a man among men, the only man who is an exception among his kind!"

"He certainly is an exception…" Koala chuckled, reminding herself about the chaos he had caused on Dressrosa.

Within the blink of an eye Hancock flew at her, hands pinning the revolutionary against the bathtub, "Luffy is mine and mine alone do you hear?"

Koala blinked, "...I'm sorry?"

"Oh don't you try that on me! Luffy is a great man, any girl would swoon before him, so don't tell me that you feel anything less than adoration for him-"

"Now just hang on a moment-"

"Look at that body! Luffy has always been the ideal physical specimen, but I swear his muscles just grow every time we meet! Oooh! It makes me drool just thinking about how he could sweep me up in his manly arms and-"

"Boa Hancock will you please just shut up!" Koala yelled.

Hancock froze, "Did you...tell me to 'shut up'." How could someone tell  _ her _ , the Pirate Empress, to shut up? Her knuckles cracked. Stay calm Hancock. Marigold said be nice to her. So be nice.

"Yes I did, otherwise you were going to keep talking over me without hearing what I have to say." She flopped back, sighing. "You don't need to worry, I'm not interested in Luffy romantically."

Hancock's perfect mouth fell into a perfect 'o'.

"Hell, from all I've heard about him in the past two years he's more like a little brother than anything else."

The Pirate Empress paused, before slowly settling down next to Koala, "Are you sure?"

"Very. He's nowhere near my type."

"...but...he's perfect…"

She sighed once more, "You should meet Sabo. You guys would get along like a house on fire."

"That is...Luffy's older brother, is he not?"

"Yup. They only reunited about a week ago though."

"A week?" Hancock's head snapped towards her, "Where?"

Koala chuckled, "I guess the papers haven't quite got here yet. Luffy took down Doflamingo in Dressrosa. I think he's supposed to get a pretty high bounty increase." She smiled at her, "I didn't meet him myself, I had a job to do after all, but he seemed to be doing well. He was smiling at least."

A small smile and a blush flitted over Hancock's face, "So he was happy. That's good to hear."

The two sat side by side, two different but all too similar brands on each of their backs. The Hoof of the Flying Dragon, and the mark of the Sun Pirates. It only took a glance for Hancock to know that Koala was the same as her. For why else would a human be branded with that mark?

Neither said a word about it though. They knew what sort of answer they would get if they asked. And neither wanted to be reminded about that time.

A tense silence hung in the steamy air, the sweet scent turning sickly sweet and suffocating.

"I can tell you some stories I've heard about Luffy's childhood if you want."

"Luffy as a child?! PLEASE!"

And with that, any hostility between them was shattered. It was as if they had found a bit of themselves in each other. A mutual understanding.

Marigold and Sandersonia smiled at each other outside the door as they listened to the excited whoops and giggles. They were pleased for their sister.

She had desperately needed a friend.

* * *

Sabo panted heavily, letting the flames in his hand die down. Why did Amazon Lily have to be in the middle of the Calm Belt? No. The real question was why there were so many Sea Kings in the Calm Belt. He could handle a Sea King no problem...but when there were at least 20 ganging up on him at a time even he was a little stretched.

He grimaced, rummaging in his pocket for the scrap of Koala's Vivre Card and watched impatiently as it inched across his hand. Raising a hand above his eyes he squinted towards the horizon.

There, in the distance, lay a tiny dark blur.

He smirked. Bingo.

"Hang in there a little longer, Koala. I'm coming."

* * *

"Sister, there is a small boat heading this way."

"I see." Hancock glanced at Koala as they towelled themselves dry. "Do you think it is one of your friends?"

She groaned, rolling her eyes, "Probably. They must be worried that I was captured since I didn't give my report. Do you know who it is?"

"They were a little far to see any specifics," Marigold continued from the other side of the door, "but the scouts think the boat was being propelled by flames."

"Oh that  _ idiot _ !" Koala gritted her teeth, frantically shaking the rest of the water out of her hair.

Hancock watched her warily, "Why? Who is it?"

"Sabo," she spat out.

"Luffy's older brother!" She clasped her hands together, "I can ask him for his blessing for our future marriage."

"I need to talk to him before he does anything stupid like burn the whole island down." Koala stormed out the room, "I told him-  _ I actually told him _ \- not to come after me if I was captured but nooooooooo he never listens." Her head flicked back and forth, "Where are my clothes?"

"Getting disposed of, obviously," Hancock shrugged on the silk robe her sister offered her, "They were simply disgusting anyway, especially with that layer of sap."

"D-disposed of?!" She shrieked, "No! I need to go out there and stop him now! Gimme my clothes back! I can't go out like this!"

Hancock smirked, "I was never suggesting you would. My girls will dress you appropriately as part of our thanks. Enishida! Anemone! Helian!"

The three appeared out of nowhere, "Come right this way please!"

Koala gritted her teeth. Knowing the Snake Princess, this could not end well. But still, what choice did she have. "Fine." She stormed off after Anemone and Helian, muttering curses under her breath.

"Snake Princess?" Enishida lingered behind, waiting for her orders.

Hancock tapped her chin. A brainwave had struck her in the bath, particularly because her guest kept talking about this Sabo in her stories. If he was Luffy's brother, he must have some of his delicious charm! Even Ace, in her most humble opinion, was alright for a man. He had nothing on Luffy's perfection of course, but he was better than average. Perhaps Sabo had the same effect on Koala as Luffy did on her.

Her hands clapped over her mouth.

Koala was suffering the Love Sickness too! She knew she had felt a bond between them! Her fists clenched. At least her feelings seemed reciprocated. Sabo was coming to save her after all. So why did she not say anything about it...

Hancock gasped. A forbidden romance! Koala did say that they were coworkers. Now she understood everything. So close, yet so far. They wanted to be together, yet were restricted by workplace regulations. Oh, how tragic! It sounded just like one of those stories in the magazines Elder Nyon had leant her to try and educate herself in the ways of love. Well, she'd learnt something from that! She would do her best to ensure the happiness of her guest. No...she was more than a guest by now. She would help her friend overcome this great trial.

In addition, Luffy was sure to be grateful to her for helping his brother obtain happiness. She squealed despite herself. He was going to be so grateful! But first things first. She drew herself up to her full height, "Enishida."

"Yes Snake Princess?"

"Call all the Kuja. Tell them to prepare Wedding Ceremony Number-" Which one would work best for Koala and her mystery man? Oh yes! -"Number 28."

Enishida's jaw dropped, "But Snake Princess...are you sure you want to put so much effort into an outsider?"

"She is no mere outsider!" Hancock flung her arms out, "She is one of the few individuals who I happen to have admiration for! We are going to put this ceremony on for her out of the kindness of our hearts! Indeed, I personally with conduct the ceremony."

"Y...yes Snake Princess…But what about her clothes-?"

"You have my permission to alter dress 8 so that it can correctly fit her." She wasn't that keen on wedding dress 8. It was a little too elaborate. So elaborate that it somehow made her face look plain. She had 30 or so more anyways. She would be ready whenever Luffy finally asked her to marry him. She'd planned multiple ceremonies for them, mercilessly drilling the Kuja how to set each one up to perfection. And now, she would actually see a wedding for herself.

She giggled, striding off to get herself properly prepared. She was actually looking forwards to this.

* * *

"Where is she?" Sabo barked, leaping off his boat. He expected resistance, at least some pointed spears or something. After all, he'd noticed some commotion as he pulled up. As if they were setting something up. And no man had ever been allowed onto Amazon Lily before.

So to say he was surprised when he was instead met with two rows of Kuja tossing uncooked rice onto him was an understatement.

"You are Mr Sabo, correct?" An extremely tall woman in an odd helmet knelt down before him, "Please, don't worry. Miss Koala is perfectly safe."

His mouth opened. Then closed. Open. Closed. Open. Closed. The pattern continued for a considerable period of time while Sabo scrambled for his bearings. Eventually, he let out an eloquent, "...Huh?"

She gestured down the pathway of dried rice, "Continue down here and you shall meet her soon."

Just...what? Sabo had no idea what to do. Could this be a trap? But even so, if Koala really was down there…

He ever so slowly shuffled down the path, trying to ignore the giggling women that followed him. This was...weirder than weird. Just what had he gotten himself into?

The path wove all the way around the Kuja town, more and more of the warriors falling into place behind him. And, oddly enough, there were piles of meat being cooked everywhere. Meat which the Kuja looked horrified at him for passing up.

These women were weird too. But then again, considering that they had been isolated from the outside world that was pretty much a given.

The path turned the final corner. Sabo now had what he though was the entire town trailing behind him, still pelting him with rice. He grimaced as two well aimed grains fired into his shoulder. He was going to have a fine collection of bruises from this. These Kuja were stronger than he'd originally thought. If they were to turn hostile on him, he was getting more worried than he would like to be about his chances.

A large metal gate loomed ahead, flanked by two large warriors. These, he recognised. Boa Marigold and Boa Sandersonia. Two of the three Gorgon Sisters. He braced himself, preparing for an attack. But they just grinned toothily at him, pushing open the gate as if it weighed absolutely nothing instead of several tonnes.

He gulped, taking in a circular arena with some sort of moat around it. A moat, he noted as he glanced down, filled with long thin spikes.

Sabo's trap senses were tingling. This wasn't looking good in the slightest. His knuckles cracked. Just a flick of a finger, a single flick, and he could set everything on fire, go get Koala, and get the hell out of here.

"Go on," Boa Marigold towered over him, smile turning into something...almost sinister, "Wait in the centre. She'll be here soon."

Well… he owed the Pirate Empress for taking care of Luffy didn't he? He'd let this slide. Just this once. And if it  _ was _ a trap, then she'd be left with an incinerated island. That was fair, wasn't it.

Sucking in a lungful of air, he set his foot on the first stair towards the middle.

The Kuja flooded in behind him, eagerly racing to fill the vast seating area. It became a warzone quite quickly, particularly for the front seats, but a hiss from Sandersonia stopped them dead.

In the middle, Sabo couldn't help but feel that he was a spectacle. An animal in a ring. Thousands of pairs of eyes were boring into him expectantly, waiting.

Waiting for what?

Something was tossed around his neck. Blinking, he raised an eyebrow at the flamboyant flower garland drooping over the wide brim of his hat. Just what was going on?

"Kuja!" An authoritative voice barked.

The murmurs died instantly, the audience waiting with baited breath.

Boa Hancock spread her arms wide from her podium at the top of the arena, "I welcome you, on this auspicious day, to bless this happy couple."

Sabo should have used the natural pause to stop her, but her words hadn't quite sunk in yet. To say he was confused was an understatement. A major understatement.

"We do not normally welcome men to our island-" Her voice pierced through the silence with ease, all eyes on her as she descended the set of stairs- "However, this man is an exception. For he is family of our beloved Luffy!"

The crowd twittered in surprise, soft chatters rippling like wildfire through the circular stands.

Hancock raised her hand.

Silence.

"Therefore it is my greatest honour to conduct this ceremony, and pronounce these two to be honourably wed-"

"BOA HANCOCK!"

Sabo sagged with relief as he heard the familiar voice. He turned, "Ko…" and froze, "...ala?"

She growled, stomping into the arena. Although she, for once, didn't look all that intimidating. After all, it was hard to look intimidating in a puffy pure white dress with billowing sleeves and a skirt that was more than twice the width of her shoulders. Especially since the dress had obviously been made for a much taller woman, so she had to bunch it off the ground to so much as walk.

Her usual smiling eyes flashed with rage under a thin line of kohl, and her painted scarlet lips pressed into a fine line. "Just what the hell do you think you're doing?!"

"Oh Koala!" Hancock smiled, oblivious to the oncoming storm that already had Sabo quaking in his boots. "You're early. I hadn't even finished my speech yet-"

Koala's bouquet of tropical flowers slammed into her face, "Speech? SPEECH?! WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE PLAYING AT!?"

The Kuja hushed. No outsider had ever spoken to the Snake Princess like that. How would she react. In the corner, Elder Nyon did her best not to laugh.

Hancock blinked at her, "What do you mean? I thought you wanted this."

"LIKE HELL I WANT A WEDDING!" She tore out the decorative comb, letting her hair fall down to her chin once more.

Sabo's tongue finally unstuck itself from the top of his mouth, "Wait...a wedding!?" His head span, "Is this why you didn't reply…?"

"NO!" A gloved hand slapped him across the face. "I DIDN'T REPLY BECAUSE A DERANGED WARLORD ABDUCTED ME!"

"Deranged?!" Hancock drew herself to her full height, "How dare you call me deranged! I was trying to help you, and this is how you repay me?"

"Listen to me. I. Don't. Want. A. Wedding! Not at all. Not ever. And especially not with this idiot!" Her finger jabbed into Sabo's cheek.

"Ouch…"

"Look, I'm grateful that you've taken care of me, I haven't relaxed like that in ages, but this is a little too far." Koala sagged, "I know you mean well...but just ask me next time before you decide something like that by yourself. I don't want my life decided for me."

Hancock stiffened. She hadn't seen it like that at all. She just thought...she was helping.

"I might have been a bit rude before." Koala reached up and put her hand on her shoulder, "But you're actually not so bad underneath that bitchiness."

The Snake Princess' face softened, and she smiled, "Yes. You might have a point. I...I apologise."

A collective gasp rose up from the Kuja.

Koala rolled her eyes, "I guess that'll have to do. Now, can I finally leave? I have a job to do."

"Yes." Hancock recollected herself, cocking her chin towards her subjects, "Kuja, please prepare some supplies for our guests." She glanced over Koala, letting out a little giggle, "And a change of clothes."

"Does she have to?" Sabo smirked, "I think she looks quite pre-"

A foot planted itself into his face, and a fist into his stomach. Sabo staggered, collapsing in a heap on the ground.

Hancock and Koala sighed, lowering their respective limbs to roll their eyes at each other.

"A far cry from Luffy isn't he?"

"Most definitely." Hancock clasped Koala's hands, holding out the number of a transponder snail, "If you ever have any worries, with him or with anything else, please do not hesitate to let me know."

Koala blinked, taking the thin slip of parchment, "Wow… Are you sure?"

"I consider you to be a…" her brow scrunched up, "a… what's that word again? Luffy used it at some point…"

"A friend?"

"Yes that was it!" She smiled, "But even if you don't, it...it would be nice to keep in touch."

Snorting, Koala rolled her eyes, "You just want me to keep an eye on Luffy."

Hancock sagged. Was she really that obvious?

"I will keep you posted," Koala grinned, stepping back to drag the groaning Sabo off the arena, "And yeah…" She rummaged in her pocket for something to write with. Leaning forwards, she scribbled something on Hancock's hand. Her own number, "We'll keep in touch. Try not to host any impromptu weddings again."

Hancock stared at the ink marring her perfect skin, "I shall try not to."

Koala winked, "I'll hold you to that."

A few hours and a change of clothes later, Hancock found that she wasn't at all bothered as her newfound acquaintances vanished into the distance, waving as manically as she had when they first met. It wasn't as if she wouldn't miss Koala. It was just...she didn't mind staying on the island for a bit.

For some reason, her Love Sickness was just a bit more manageable now.


End file.
